Spartanburg, SC — According to sources not authorized to speak for presidential candidate Haley, we can report tonight that Haley has requested a team of podiatrists and chiropractors to join her campaign, as she hits the road on the final leg before the South Carolina primary on February 24, 2024.
Mrs. Haley has had problems with keeping her foot out of her mouth during her campaign, and hopefully, these medical specialists will be an asset to her team.
The chiropractic team will also help with Haley’s maneuvering, as she often changes position regularly on whatever is being discussed with that particular audience at that time. Even though she is not old yet, her age could lead to problems in the contortionist part of her interactions with audiences.
If push comes to shove, according to a spokesperson, Haley may have to search for a couple of acrobats, to learn some new balancing acts.